Sunday, November 28, 2010

1 year ago this week the Tiger Woods Scandal happened. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY KNUCKLEHEAD!!


It was one year ago that we saw the undoing of a great man. Tiger Woods is the first billion dollar sports figure. The first golf pro who was set to eclipse every record the sport ever produced in  record time. Then it all came to an end. Actually the end came in the form of a tree at the end of his block in a swanky affluent part of Florida.




That's the smile of man who thinks he's getting over.

Tiger was busted by his wife for cheating. Which in and of itself is not so surprising. The institution of traditional marriage has been on a crumbling foundation for quite some time now and infidelity is pretty much old news. But what made Tiger's dalliances such a big story was the fact that he took great pains to sculpture a squeaky clean family man public image. But thinking about it further, Tiger didn't so much project a clean image as much as he ferociously protected his privacy. He did it so well that all that was left for the public was the nice stuff he allowed us to see.

And what was worse than the cheating in itself the scale of it. Nineteen women over a five year marriage, thats about 4 bitches a year. Well 3.8 to exact, maybe one of them we hadn't heard about was a midget. Four women a year on average. That's about right for a playboy millionaire. But Tiger wasn't supposed to be a playboy millionaire, he was supposed to be a staid family man. And in a world where, thanks to internet social networking, Andy Warhol's claim of everyone being famous for 15 minutes is fast coming true, its not surprising that nearly all nineteen women came out of the wood work on his ass. Once the first one was exposed, it was a free for all for who could garner the most media attention while the opportunity was there. As a fan of Tiger, I was most disappointed in the fact that he walked right into the landmine that so many others famous men had before him.

Before there was Charlie's Angels. Now there's just Tiger's Hoes.
Its mind-boggling how many well known men think they can get away with that kind of behavior in this day and time. The other thing that disappointed me is that that deep down, Tiger knew what kind of man he is. He knows he likes his woman varied and freaky. So for him to settle down at such a young and vibrant point in his life was just plain stupid. And speaking of freaky women, once a upon a time, floozies used to have a sense of discretion. Back in the day, groupies and star fuckers knew how to keep their legs open and their mouths shut. Even when one of them would write a tell-all book it was usually years after the affair and even then they had the decency to not name names totally or give blow by blow (literally) details. Now, it seems like every whore fucks and tweets. And to see major news networks vying for these bitches attention was totally sickening. I was done with the scandal when Entertainment Tonight or Access or what ever tabloid show that just happened to be on the television had dug up one of Tiger's old high school girlfriends and tried to say he was cheating on her back then. Really??  Did they actually probe into what Tiger did as a teenager some 15 years ago?

But Tiger brought it all on himself.  If there was ever a model for self destructive behavior this was it. Today Tiger is divorced. His game has suffered the worst setback and slump of his career, even worse than when his father died. And on October 31 he lost his number one ranking. Now he has to rebuild his image, but this time it will be more realistic. In time,Tiger's game should come back, he'll be number one again and people have already moved past his marital indiscretions (I know he was secretly thanking Jesse James for cheating on Sandra Bullock)  but this event will go down in tabloid history (even when he fucks up he sets records) as one of the most compelling train wrecks an athlete/celebrity at the top of his game could ever have.

Good Tiger and Evil Tiger...which one is here to stay?


I know...I know... you're thinking "what about Kobe?" but the rape charges were dropped, no other women came out and his wife didn't divorce him.


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