Sunday, May 18, 2014

How Solange f'd up RUN for Beyonce and Jay Z

A faux trailer of a supposed Bonnie and Clyde style heist/action flick, Beyonce and her mogul husband are a desperate, I got your back boo, bad ass duo living on the edge (on the edge of what is the question). The trailer is stocked with all kinds of celebrity cameos and action film tropes including, running from the cops, explosions and automatic gunfire. Who are the good guys? Who are the bad guys? Does it matter? Sean Penn, Don Cheadle and Jake Gyllenhaal all look like they're playing variations of the same character and the whole thing feels like it was written bullet point style on a tablet while sipping mimosas. I just imagine Beyonce taking a sip then getting excited with a thought and saying "Oh, Oh! What if I'm hanging out of the window of a moving car shooting an Uzi! Now that's HOT! Write that down!"

All the dialogue (what little there is) seems like they were improvised on the spot and I swear Jay Z and Cheadle were talking about two completely different things in the same scene. And the whole thing ends with the tag: Coming Never.

And while tongue was thoroughly in cheek when they did this, the whole piece was designed to keep the cool buzz going and to promote the "crazy in love/all I need in this world is me and my girlfriend" public facade that Jay and Bey so meticulously constructed.

All of that was severely hampered by one act:

If we saw that trailer before last week, we would have thought, funny, kinda interesting but Beyonce can barely act and Jay just behaves on camera and that would have been it. Throughout the whole video we see them together surrounded by mounds of money and guns. Always proclaiming they're undying love for each other. Implying they'd die for each other but now its all laughable because we watched Clyde get pummeled while Bonnie stood by like a statue. What happened to "its me and you boo"? All the speculation and theories primarily point to Jay Z's rumored wandering eye being the impetus for little sister Solange's rage and Beyonce's tacit allowance of her to strike out at her husband. Jay Z is married to one the most beautiful women in the industry and yet those rumors have persisted over the years. I guess that old adage is true: “Show me a beautiful woman, and I’ll show you a man who’s tired of fucking her”

The trailer is a part of the "On The Run Tour" promotion for the couple and while I'm sure the concerts will be successful, all of the "you and me against the world" songs they'll perform will ring a bit more hollow now. 

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